Another year of TV has recently come to a close, and this year, I was treated to four TV weddings. Of these four TV weddings, only one of them went somewhat as planned, and even that is a bit of a stretch. Haven’t you noticed how TV weddings can never go right? There’s always gotta be something that happens, something that messes up what is supposed to be the most magical event of these characters’ lives.
I feel so bad for all these fictional characters. I mean, I myself have not gotten married, but I imagine that when I do things will go as planned, and if things did go awry, they’d be very small, insignificant things like an awkward 10-second break in between songs or a glass breaking accidentally. Things that when my future attractive husband and I look back on the event we won’t really remember or care about because everything else came together perfectly.
But TV characters don’t get that luxury because TV weddings always go wrong. Always. Why is that? Why can’t we just get a nice event where it all goes right? Do networks think that’s boring? Because I’m at the point now where wedding mishaps are what’s boring me. Oh, a literal last-minute unexpected venue change? Wowee. I can’t even enjoy the events because I’m just so annoyed to watch yet another TV wedding go awry only to have it come together in a ‘cute’ way at the very end. We have to sit there and pretend that the ‘cute’ way is more meaningful and special and it’s all good when it is NOT all good. It is not all good at all, because if those ‘cute’ little weddings happened in real life to real life people who spent real life time and money planning their dream wedding, it would suck to have it all be messed up on the day of.
I did a count, and I have seen 28 TV weddings over 16 shows (give or take a few, and I’m not counting shows where there were only quick clips of a wedding like This Is Us or The Middle). Of those shows, 8 are comedies and the others are actions/dramas. Of course, not every wedding from those 28 were complete messes. Barney and Robin’s wedding in How I Met Your Mother goes over smoothly except for the fact that both of them had major pre-wedding jitters. Chandler and Monica’s wedding in Friends also goes well except that Joey arrives in a soldier costume from filming and does an awful job as the minister, and the reception is largely overshadowed among the three girls by Rachel’s pregnancy. Brittany and Santana’s wedding on Glee also goes well, except Kurt and Blaine spontaneously got married alongside them, so though they gave the go-ahead, it was clearly not what they planned for.
The only two TV weddings that I can think of that go essentially perfectly in terms of who attends and how it happens are Jane and Kurt’s on Blindspot (though we didn’t really see the wedding, only a quick montage and later some recordings) and Burt and Carole’s on Glee. Burt and Carole weren’t even main characters; they were hardly secondary characters. Isn’t it sad that those are the only two TV weddings that I can think of that go completely well?
Can you think of other TV weddings that go perfectly? Because if you can, cherish them for defying the genre and odds. Relish in their easiness because who knows when we’ll see another one again. And in case a TV writer is for some reason reading this post, know that I for one would really appreciate seeing nice TV weddings that go according to plan. We root for these characters, and in some cases, their lives are stressful enough, so they at the very least deserve to have a nice wedding day. We as viewers deserve that too. Please.